Fat people are just that. Fat. Skinny people are ... well ... skinny.
What about those who fall in the middle? People who have been fat at one point in their lives, but have committed to a better lifestyle and are on their way to being skinny – or at least not fat.
People who aren’t at their optimal weight but wish to be?
People like me.
I hate my current status.
I love my current status.
You have to understand, before I began my trip to 366 pounds, I wore a 40/30 size pants and XL or XXL shirts. As I increased my heft those sizes also expanded until I eventually had to call my father-in-law’s friend – Omar the tent maker – to have clothes made that were large enough to gird my loins.
The thing is, I would buy clothes at Costco that should have fit because they were my current size, but by the time I had downed all of the tempting samples, eaten two slices of Costco-sized pizza, and washed it all down with a gallon of Sprite or Dr. Pepper from the limitless refill machines I would have expanded by half an inch. The pants would no longer fit.
I pulled a pair of those pants – eight years old and brand new with the tags still attached – off the hanger in the closet and tried them on.
I was impressed with the look, the style, the fresh newness of it all, and the fact that I didn’t bulge in all the wrong places.
I tried on a dress shirt I’d received from a former co-worker that was just an XL and ...
I stood in front of the mirror for a couple of minutes admiring my new look and then realized that I was emotionally torn.
I loved the new me, but I’m not satisfied.
I’m down to 280 pounds, someplace I’ve not been for longer than I can remember, and I’m feeling great.
I like the fact that I can run a couple games of basketball, instead of just up the floor and back again, and not be needing a supplemental oxygen supply.
I like the fact that I can run after, or away from, my kids and not fall to the ground panting like I’m standing in the rarified air at 14,000 feet on top of Mt. Shasta. That’s an eventual goal for me by the way – summiting Shasta, not falling to the ground.
I like the fact that I can train for the Azalea Festival 10k run organized by my friend Brittany Jenkins.
But ... I hate the fact that I’m not where I want to be. I’ve come to the realization that my new lifestyle will stabilize my weight where my body needs it to be. My final weight may stabilize at 260 pounds, my goal weight, or it may stabilize lower or slightly higher, but no matter where it stabilizes, it will be for a lifetime.
By eating right, and eating well, my body will take care of itself.
People who don’t know what I was before I started my path to better health probably look at me and think, “there goes a guy who is letting his weight get away from him.”
Those who know me know better, and most importantly, I know better.
In the end, I guess the only person who matters is me.
As long as I’m constantly working and making myself better, that’s all that is important.
As the saying goes, “Those who matter, care; those who don’t care, don’t matter.”